WBC,
I’ve been trying to find a husband. I’ve been talking with a man who told me he’s a contemporary christain, will look that up later, on OkCupid. He just told me he believes in CDD, Christian Domestic Discipline! Husbands spanking/disciplining their wives. My parents used a belt on me as a child but they never disciplined each other. I started laughing. Does your church do or do you know of any church’s that do anything like that?
— Cari
Dear Cari –
It made me laugh, too, from the prideful audacity of it all. I don’t think he is quite so much a contemporary Christian, as he is a sadist/pervert.
No, and if there was ever a time for you to get your hands on a Bible and READ THE WORDS, it would be now. So could I suggest this: STOP LOOKING FOR A HUSBAND, or you might get something more than you could have imagined.
1 Cor. 7:34 There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband. 35 And this I speak for your own profit; not that I may cast a snare upon you, but for that which is comely, and that ye may attend upon the Lord without distraction.
CAVEAT: If you are not about the business of serving the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength, just don’t bother to look at those verses as if they have anything to do with you.
For you see, if you commit your way unto the Lord and trust also in Him (likewise, if you acknowledge God in all your doings, goings, comings, ways, etc.) HE will direct your steps. But if you are not going to do that, these words are not for you.
The matter of marriage is so important and the symbol of it, as being Christ and His bride, in this earth, and the necessity that you marry, ONLY in the Lord is for the servants of God.
For the servants of God, we would begin this discussion here:
Isaiah 50:10 ¶ Who is among you that feareth the LORD, that obeyeth the voice of his servant, that walketh in darkness, and hath no light? let him trust in the name of the LORD, and stay upon his God. 11 Behold, all ye that kindle a fire, that compass yourselves about with sparks: walk in the light of your fire, and in the sparks that ye have kindled. This shall ye have of mine hand; ye shall lie down in sorrow.
If you trust in the NAME of the Lord your God, and you wait upon Him to send you a proper husband, you do well. If, on the other hand, you begin to take matters into your own hands, and kindle your own fire, and walk in the light of that sorry fire, you have God’s word for it: you will lie down in sorrow. You can end up with some prating fool that has pulled his notions of how to treat his wife from his backside, or worse, from his dark evil and perverse heart!
RUN FROM THAT PILE OF HUMAN DUNG! Say to him: Thanks for the warning, and don’t let the door hit your backside on the way out.
Here is the standard of the Lord our God about the relationship between husbands and wives, to wit:
Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. 25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church.
Colossians 3:18 ¶ Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. 19 Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.
1 Peter 3:1 ¶ Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; 2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. 3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. 5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: 6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement. 7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
The expositors have many good words on these passages and before you look at the matter of a husband further, you might get those words and read them all. Begin with John Gill and don’t stop until you have read them all. The women in this world are cheated when they get anything short of this kind of relationship. This world offers sorry scum for husbands, and the fact that that man had the audacity to tell you to your face that he intends to spank you, speaks volumes about the sorry and brutish state of his soul. He would build his prideful house on sand and GREAT will be the ruin of it all. You would do well to never have a husband than to participate in that kind of mess.
This effort to answer you is inept and incomplete, but it points you in the right direction. Thanks for asking.
Your friends at WBC.
PS – The scriptures speak to spanking children, but not a word about spanking wives.