When I was young and foolish, I married a man who had been married before. He said he was divorced, but he may not have been at the time we married. After nearly 13 years of marriage, I divorced him because he was an alcoholic and begun having blackouts and beating me. I left him before he decided to beat our two daughters.
So, my question is, can I remarry? I am not in a hurry to do so, but eventually I would like to. Are my daughters’ illegitimate? Have I damned them? I am older now and want to walk in the light of the Lord.
Can you recommend an appropriate version of the Bible to study? There are so many, and I really don’t know which version is closest to the true word.
I thank you in advance for your kind attention in this matter.
Sincerely,
Mary
Hello Mary.
Thank you for writing. Here is a good passage to start with–
1 Corinthians 7:
29 But this I say, brethren, the time is short: it remaineth, that both they that have wives be as though they had none; 30 And they that weep, as though they wept not; and they that rejoice, as though they rejoiced not; and they that buy, as though they possessed not;
31 And they that use this world, as not abusing it: for the fashion of this world passeth away.
32 But I would have you without carefulness. He that is unmarried careth for the things that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord:
33 But he that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may please his wife.
A good perspective at this hour is to serve God, teach your children the truth about God, and realize that the wrath of God is pouring out on this nation and its destruction is coming apace. The fullness of the Gentiles is nearly here–and then God will turn to dealing with His first fruits–the Jews–and His Final Indignation on that rebellious house (which mercifully will include the calling out of His elect Jews, 144,000 of them, see Rev. 7 and 14)–leading to the end of all things. We are, in other words, living in the Last of All Days–so marrying should be low priority. Another passage that helps on that point is this short little chapter from Jeremiah, talking to a man who helped him in his ministry–
Jeremiah 45:
1 The word that Jeremiah the prophet spake unto Baruch the son of Neriah, when he had written these words in a book at the mouth of Jeremiah, in the fourth year of Jehoiakim the son of Josiah king of Judah, saying,
2 Thus saith the LORD, the God of Israel, unto thee, O Baruch;
3 Thou didst say, Woe is me now! for the LORD hath added grief to my sorrow; I fainted in my sighing, and I find no rest.
4 Thus shalt thou say unto him, The LORD saith thus; Behold, that which I have built will I break down, and that which I have planted I will pluck up, even this whole land.
5 And seekest thou great things for thyself? seek them not: for, behold, I will bring evil upon all flesh, saith the LORD: but thy life will I give unto thee for a prey in all places whither thou goest.
Jeremiah was preaching to doomed Judah, and he had to help Baruch get a perspective about the vanity and temporal nature of everything around him.
That would be good advice for you at this hour also. Baruch was not content; it’s good to be content in the station in which God has put you, and not kick against it or seek your own. Humble yourself under the mighty hand of God, is my kind advice. You have your hands full teaching those children to serve God in this dark apostate howling-wilderness perverse generation amongst whom they were born.
Meanwhile, if the man you married had been previously married–you were living in adultery with him–not married to him. If he had NOT been previously married, you were his wife, and you will always be his wife, and you cannot be another man’s wife. Christ is clear on this–one man, one woman, one lifetime. See Matthew 5:32 and Heb. 13:4. (The “fornication” as the one exception for a man to put away his wife refers to the law of Moses that said if a man was told by his wife she was a virgin, and he learned for the first time on his wedding night that she was not, he had a one time opportunity to put her away and the marriage did not therefore exist.)
The destruction of all things draws nigh. The time to mourn for your sins, repent, and obey God–and teach your children to obey God which is their only hope in this life–is short.
Take care.
Mary,
Incorporating by reference the first response to you earlier, please be advised:
Under the hypothetical you created, our answer would be: That female is free to marry unless he put away his first wife for the cause of fornication (Bible defined: a fraud was committed upon the marriage agreement by her false statement she was a virgin, upon which he reasonably relied and upon discovering it immediately on the wedding night he divorced her immediately thereafter upon discovering the fraud and did not overlook it). See Hebrews 13:4, Matthew 19:9 (Deuteronomy 22:13-21), and Romans 7:2-3 (gender neutral standard).
The other short answer is that “illegitimate” is not a concept recognized by the Bible but a legal concept which is archaic in most U.S. states. “Illegitimate” were legal concepts created for purposes of inheriting property; but d.n.a. and adoption and presumptions of being a parent created by the law establishes inheritance rights at this point under most state laws.The Bible concept of a “bastard” relates to a person who is not disciplined and/or who is not exercised by chastening of the Lord and/or who does not endure the chastening of the Lord because he is not a child of God but a child of Satan. See Hebrews 12:7-8 and see generally John 8:44.
The full text of those referenced verses are:
Hebrews 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.
Matthew 19:9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
Deuteronomy 22:13-21: 13 If any man take a wife, and go in unto her, and hate her, 14 And give occasions of speech against her, and bring up an evil name upon her, and say, I took this woman, and when I came to her, I found her not a maid: 15 Then shall the father of the damsel, and her mother, take and bring forth the tokens of the damsel’s virginity unto the elders of the city in the gate: 16 And the damsel’s father shall say unto the elders, I gave my daughter unto this man to wife, and he hateth her; 17 And, lo, he hath given occasions of speech against her, saying, I found not thy daughter a maid; and yet these are the tokens of my daughter’s virginity. And they shall spread the cloth before the elders of the city. 18 And the elders of that city shall take that man and chastise him; 19 And they shall amerce him in an hundred shekels of silver, and give them unto the father of the damsel, because he hath brought up an evil name upon a virgin of Israel: and she shall be his wife; he may not put her away all his days. 20 But if this thing be true, and the tokens of virginity be not found for the damsel: 21 Then they shall bring out the damsel to the door of her father’s house, and the men of her city shall stone her with stones that she die: because she hath wrought folly in Israel, to play the whore in her father’s house: so shalt thou put evil away from among you.
Romans 7:2 For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband. 3 So then if, while her husband liveth, she be married to another man, she shall be called an adulteress: but if her husband be dead, she is free from that law; so that she is no adulteress, though she be married to another man.
Hebrews 12:7-8: 7 If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not? 8 But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons.
John 8:44 Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it.
This marriage business is deadly serious:
Malachi 3:-17: 14 Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant. 15 And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth. 16 For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the LORD of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously. 17 Ye have wearied the LORD with your words. Yet ye say, Wherein have we wearied him? When ye say, Every one that doeth evil is good in the sight of the LORD, and he delighteth in them; or, Where is the God of judgment?
As to walking in the light of the Lord, that concept has no relevance outside of a member walking orderly within the Church of the Lord Jesus Christ in the earth, which he has established as the pillar and ground of the truth. Outside of that light, the remainder of the world’s population walks in the light of their owns sparks, making up morality from their dark hearts.
Isaiah 50:10-11: 10 Who is among you that feareth the LORD, that obeyeth the voice of his servant, that walketh in darkness, and hath no light? let him trust in the name of the LORD, and stay upon his God. 11 Behold, all ye that kindle a fire, that compass yourselves about with sparks: walk in the light of your fire, and in the sparks that ye have kindled. This shall ye have of mine hand; ye shall lie down in sorrow. (That is to say, you’re going to hell).
Which of course reminds me of Westboro Baptist Church’s parody called “Fear God”, which goes like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4AKN-89_4k
Lyrics are here: http://www.godhatesfags.com/lyrics/20100731_fear-god.pdf
From your best friends at WBC.