WBC,
I know that I am one of the “vessels of wrath made for destruction” and that I am going to hell. I also believe that I’ll deserve everysecond of it. It grieves me, but but there is nothing I can do about it. However, why can’t God give me one of those “delusions” so I can at least get through this life with some peace? Knowing you are going to hell is not happy way to go through life.
Robert
Robert,
I would look for something to find comfort in.
For one, you are still sensible that you are guilty and unworthy, while the majority of the miasma of humanity wallows in numbness. It says their consciences have been seared with a hot iron:
1 Timothy 4:2 “Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron;”
You feel the grief of that impending eternal wrath. You have a knowledge of it & seemingly a fear of it.
I would find much hope in that, myself.
Second, I would use that anxious energy expended on dreading the wrath to come and hastily put my hand to finding evidence of more hope and any indication that I may escape that wrath. You are still alive. You still draw breath. Do not give up. You don’t know what the Lord will do from here on, so strive!
Luke 13:24 “Strive to enter in at the strait gate: for many, I say unto you, will seek to enter in, and shall not be able.”
If you will not/cannot do that, there is no peace or happiness to be had.
Thanks for writing,
Member of WBC